Who am I? What am I supposed to be doing with my life? (Kelsey Sandefur, LPC)

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“you have searched me, Lord,

and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways...”

— Psalms 139:1-18 (NIV)

Who am I? What am I supposed to be doing with my life? Questions that clients come into therapy with often, and valid ones, at that.

We long for a sense of security in our identity. However, individual identity changes over time. Our daily schedules, our hobbies, our jobs, even our friendships and family relationships…those things may change over time whether we recognize it or not.

Maybe you used to be an athlete throughout high school and college, and now you’ve graduated and you don’t know “who you are”.

Maybe you are a new mom, heeding to all the demands of a newborn or a toddler and inevitably pushing your needs to the side, looking around, wondering “how did I get here?”.

Maybe you’re a teenager and your friends seem to have it all together, having the newest/latest/greatest things, parents that seem to let them do whatever they want, attention from everyone, while you feel lost and completely misunderstood by everyone around you.

“Identity” can be so misleading. Is it who other people say we are? Who we want to be? Who we were before graduating, getting married, having children, changing careers, etc…?

Therapy can help you find confidence in who you are and who you are made to be. It is a unique environment in which you can explore all these questions to find comfort in the person you are now, confidence in who you were made to be, and all that encompasses. Not because therapists have all the answers, but because we can provide a supportive, compassionate, non-judgmental atmosphere to assist you in finding these answers within yourself.

There is beauty in that even when we don’t know who we are, the Lord does. Psalm 139 is a beautiful reminder that God is invested in our lives, regardless of the stage of life we are in…He is all-knowing and ever-present. The different stages of our lives, the uncertainty, the insecurity, none of it is a surprise to the Lord. We can rest in knowing that we are fully known, valued, and loved in Him."